I attended my first event for JASS UTS as a member the other day.  It was a city-wide Scavenger Hunt, and it involved many hours of preparations that I didn’t have to do.  And it felt so weird.  I didn’t have to get to the event five hours early to prep or brief, I didn’t have to run around making sure things were running smoothly, I didn’t have to check that people were where they were supposed to be at the supposed times… I just had to follow instructions and finish all the tasks given to me.

And it felt so liberating.

I mean, for the first time in forever, I was mingling with members without needing to direct them in whatever, I was doing whatever I was told without needing to figure out logistics, I could be crazy and do random stuff and it was okay because I wouldn’t (maybe) scare any members away.  I was getting surprised by the challenges, and I got to tease the friends organising each challenge, because, you know, friends.

But it felt so… lacking.

I didn’t know every single detail related to the event, I didn’t know everyone who was participating, I couldn’t troll people during each challenge because I didn’t know what was happening.  And not knowing, and not having responsibilities, and not needing to do anything after to wrap up properly felt like a part of the day was missing.  I wasn’t on call.  I wasn’t needed.

I was just another member.

Having been an exec and organising every single event I’ve been to for the club, it’s like what I imagine culture shock feels like, but you know, instead of offending other people with your lack of etiquette, you’re offending your own sensibilities.  At the same time, even though I was just another member, my teammate and I were looked and regarded by the other teams with expectation.

“They’re previous execs.  They’ll ace it, even with only just two people.”

“You’re going to get helped anyway because priviledges.”

It didn’t help that most of the participants thought that we were somehow related to the event, and that some of them actually mistook us as organisers for the event.

And it hit me, for reals, right in the kokoroh, that I’ve passed on the torch to somewhat capable hands.

And now that it’s passed on… I hope they don’t blow out the torch.

But since we somehow landed a third place in the Scavenger Hunt, they must be doing their job right.